GET OUT OF TOWN NOW

WARNING!!!

Yesterday, I was walking down Durant, minding my own fucking business, when this BRIGHT GREEN FLIER pushed its fat ass into my line of sight.

"CalSERVE: 6-week countdown to REAL STUDENT POWER"

that is when i promptly threw myself into oncoming traffic.

or not, but the point of this post is evident. ASUC elections are coming, and just like the fucking 2008 presidential hopefuls, these people are not wasting any time (except yours and mine).

Yes, i ran a campaign last year (believe me, i have a decade in purgatory coming for that one), but i have the distinct feeling that if a token ethnic/religious/sexual orientation ladder-climber and/or power-grabber chases me across Sproul, trying to hand me a glossy slate card with vacant campaign promises about "increasing unity" and "student group outreach"...

MY BONY FIST WILL BACKHAND THEM WITH THE FURY OF A CHEESE GRATER POSSESSED BY THE FAMISHED GHOST OF HANNIBAL LECTER.

and then i will devour their tasty faces.